Let the Real You Shine Through - with the Right Hat!

So, I bombed! Modesty aside, I know that I am an expert trainer, I've been doing these for years and I feel very happy with it. It is my element! The other day, I was discussing a management training that I will be facilitating next week and I felt so inept. It was a meeting and I was wearing my meeting hat, the other party expected me to wear my trainer hat. What a miscommunication!

Which hat are you wearing for the occasion?



So, there I was at a one-on-one meeting, just chatting away, talking aloud to myself and her, thinking we were brainstorming. Unbeknownst to me, my client was expecting a mock training, with the bells and whistles. She is my ideal client, love working with her. She is smart and talented, very accommodating, and friendly. We’ve worked beautifully in the past. It was a surprise when I received a voice mail and an email communicating her many doubts about my performance. Oh! I felt so down! How could she have all these misgivings about my abilities? So, I went shopping! I sulked! I got depressed!

I know the material. Yet I doubted my ability to deliver it due to her feedback. So, I took out my recorder and did a mock training for my dogs. I listened to the recording and it was awesome! I was back in the driver’s seat! I felt so excited and ready!

This made me ask the question, “Are we conscious about which hat we are wearing for the various occasions in our lives?”

We have many hats hanging on the rack. For me, I have the mom hat, the friend hat, business hat, the coach hat, trainer hat, speaker hat, the cook hat, the sister hat, the daughter hat…and many more of various shapes, colors, tones, nuances. I am very big about being authentic… and I should add, with the right hat for the specific situation.

For instance, when I am hanging out with Sami, and I do that a lot, I sometimes forget to change hats from trainer to mom, or friend. Boy, does that annoy her! I will be going on and on, step by step, about how to drive to Starbucks. Note – we go there twice a day!

Or, I am having lunch with my sister, and I am wearing the mom hat, and that doesn’t go very well either. It would be a disaster if I wear the daughter hat to a client’s meeting!

Of course, I put on my "Sorry, I goofed" hat and quickly explained to my client what happened with the meeting. I am hoping she'll understand and things will go on smoothly from there. I know it will. We have great emotional bank deposits with each other.

During our busy day, as we navigate from one activity to another, it pays to seriously consider and ask the question, “Which hat am I wearing?” Definitely, let the real you shine through, with the right hat!